A theory of luck

Chinese symbol for good luckThis week has been filled with wishes of good luck as I went off to an important interview.  Everyone one I told about it was very forthcoming with this thing called luck. In fact I was told off by someone close because I had only told them about the interview afterwards, and their response was: ‘I didn’t even get a chance to wish you good luck’.    The interview went really well and I have been quietly sitting with my thoughts basking in the knowledge that it was a success.  The next natural and almost instinctual step was to tell everyone who wished me luck, and to express my gratitude for this ‘good luck’.

Since the dawn of time man has been obsessed with the idea of luck and good fortune.  Human culture is littered with examples of talismanic charms and symbols that have come to represent luck.  A rabbit’s foot, a four leafed clover, double egg yolk, an up turned horseshoe, ladybirds, scarab beetles, actors told to ‘break a leg’ and even numbers have all been assigned as purveyors fortune and good luck.

As I buzzed my way through texts and emails thanking people, a thought manifested itself and in a flurry of curiosity, questions came tumbling out:  what is luck and why are we as humans so compelled with the notion of giving it away freely and so earnestly?  Does it actually have a sphere of influence on the outcome?  Did all these people who sincerely wished me ‘luck’ actually affect the outcome?

Upon reflection these questions are somewhat weighty subjects and have been discussed at length all over the internet. You only need to delve a little deeper and you will find a wealth of information on the ideology of luck and concept of good fortune.  Philosophers have applied their logic to it, religion has wrapped its crooked fingers around it and scientists sneer at it because it is intangible and unprovable.

Me – I’m not about to delve into the genome of luck…  But rather I wish to share an intriguing thought I had as clamoured about with my questions.

Firstly what is luck?  Luck, as it is defined, is the fortunate or unfortunate outcome of an event without one’s own intention or will, and beyond control.  Success or failure apparently brought on by chance rather than through one’s own actions.  And so the cynic in logic and rationality simply says:  “this means nobody has any control of luck and therefore luck can’t really be given it away. And if it’s chance that alters my fate, then what have your wishes of luck accomplished?  They are merely kind and thoughtful words.”

If you’ve read my past posts, you will see that I often talk about something called ‘focussed intentions’. The idea behind this is simple – what you focus on, is what your reality will be.  There is nothing religious or scientific about this statement, it’s more an accepted truth if you understand the concept. The key is to know what you are focussing on and to correct your thoughts and words if you are focussing on the wrong things.   And this brings me to the last sentence of the cynical logistist: “They are merely kind and thoughtful words.”   People’s intentions are focussed through their thoughts and their words.  And if done with sincerity and honesty – they have the power to influence a desired outcome.  So I genuinely say thank you to all those who put their intentions into words and focused on me and my interview, even if it was just for a split second.  I am truly gratefully and blessed to have people that care about me so much.

The secret to success is not really a secret.  It’s about knowing one’s self and understanding how our self-beliefs work. Our limitations are a result of a poorly programmed unconscious mind and if one learns to reprogramme the unconscious, you begin to remove your limitations and unlock your true potential as a human being.

LanuageWhen we verbalise a thought, it becomes tangible and we can actually begin to analyse it – if you are analysing your thoughts you are mastering the art of being self-aware.  The key is not to question yourself and create self-doubt, but rather to find a way to positively rephrase your thoughts.  For example in preparation for my interview I repeated the following statement to myself every morning:  “I am confident, knowledgeable and successful” – instead of saying:  “I hope I get do well”.   I chose to say this phrase it in the mornings because according to research the mind is at its most receptive.  I did this to ensure that I was reprogramming my unconscious mind. I wanted those words to be a belief , a part of me and not just a statement I spoke.

If you wish to affect a real change in your life, start by your aligning your intentions with your words. Language is perhaps the most important of all your personal transformation tools because when you become self-aware and emotionally balanced, your language patterns will naturally change, but the catch is to use language patterns to become self-aware in the first place and it is also the way to focus your intentions.

As always, practise makes perfect so go out there and start to think about your daily words. Ask yourself:  “are my language patterns positive or negative?”  This simple and powerful statement is the first step to changing your language patterns.  If you need any help or advice, or just some guidance on how to do this more effectively, please use the ‘contact me’ tab.  I would be more than happy to help.

It would be remiss of me not to say ‘good luck’.

33 days – The Striped Couch challenges you!

Oh dear too many distractions – finding it a challenge to write today.  The Buddhists call it ‘monkey mind‘ – sound familiar?  You start with a single thought and before you know it, that thought has climbed through your brain like a monkey on a mission!  One thought has become a thousand and all of a sudden I can’t construct a sentence, let alone a story…  Lucky inspiration has struck!  My ever present muse, the wonderfully sophisticated and Oracle of all knowledge – Google – has come to my rescue!  Thank you Larry and Sergey, I am grateful!

In a bid to get the creative juices flowing, I inadvertently found my next post – 33 ways to be creative (unfortunately my searching skills seem to be a bit off today and I am unable to find the author of the picture attached, if anyone knows, please contact me or if you are the author, please get in touch).  It’s an inspiring list, just take a look below.  It’s not only for the ‘creative type’ – it’s for everyone…  And to prove that, I’ve come up with a challenge for you:  print out  the picture below and stick it to your mirror.  There are 33 items on the list, commit to doing each one of them (one a day) for 33 days. Make it a competition with your other half/friends,  get your mum and dad involved, tell the children (you’ll be pleasantly surprised to see how infectious the optimism of children is).  And at the end of each day, share with <insert whoever here> and find out how the task for the day went.  Challenge your Status Quo and see the difference it makes in your life.  My personal favourite on the list is number #25, I try to do this every day.  How about you?

Use the ‘Don’t be shy, say something‘ box to let me know if you’ve taken the up The Striped Couch’s 33 day challenge.  And as usual if you want any advice or guidance, just drop me a message and I’ll get back to you.

Go for it!

33 ways to stay creative

 

Shadow Shibari

Our daily bondageGiven the world’s sudden obsession with 50 Shades of Grey,  it sparked a train of thought that led me to arrive at the following question: “is bondage actually the ultimate act of freedom?”  This question got my creative cogs spinning and so I began to do a bit of reading and research.

Some of you may be familiar with the word Shibari.  For those of you who aren’t, the word Shibari has incorrectly come to mean an erotic form of Japanese rope bondage in the western world of BDSM.  Shibari is a noun and literally means ‘to tie’ or ‘to bind’.  There is very little reference as to why such a bastardisation occurred, but from my understanding it is a classic case of ‘lost in translation’.  Japanese as a language uses context specific words with particular meanings ascribed to them whereas in English, meanings can be assumed and words assimilated to have various meanings regardless of the context  The correct word to use is the adverb Kinbaku. It is the most accurate and contextually correct word to use when referring to bondage.  Its literal meaning is ‘the beauty of tight binding’ and its recognised ‘father’ is Seiu Ito.

I guess you are wondering what on earth an inspiration blogger is doing talking about bondage.  Sit tight (if you’ll pardon the very wry pun) and I shall attempt to unravel what I’m getting at.

Bondage is a component of submission.  True submission requires you to relinquish control of yourself.  You let go of your fear and insecurities, and you derive pleasure from being absolutely free from decision.  What an amazing concept, don’t you think?  To be able to put yourself in a frame of mind where you are secure in yourself,  free from worry and doubt, in a mode where you actually allow yourself to receive pleasure because there are no obstacles preventing it.  Amazing.

My question to you is, how do we emulate this mindset without subscribing to the world of BSDM?  How can we model this feeling of freedom and release ourselves from our daily ‘bondage’ (work, stress, debt, anxiety, insecurities, etc.)?

In the realm of inspiration and motivation, the first step in transforming our lives is to become self aware.  To become truly self aware we need to face who we are at ground zero; we need a clear perception of our personality, our strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, beliefs, motivation, and emotions.  But very often the path to self awareness is in the shadow of our daily bondage.  And hence the reason why I’ve called this post ‘Shadow Shibari’.  So how do we slip the ropes of our Shadow Shibari?

Well, the experience of reading through this article should hopefully have got you thinking.  And if you’re thinking, you’re on the right track.  Becoming self aware is a process, an evolution of the self.  You can only become self aware if you make the decision to explore the real you. Take a moment and reflect on this statement:  The REAL you?  Do you know who that is?

In time, I will post a series of articles that will take us on an interesting path of self discovery.  But in the meantime, here is something to help you begin your journey.

Write out the following on a piece of paper:

  1. Describe your best self in 3 words – have fun with it, think about your top 3 most positive qualities. How would you ‘sell’ yourself to someone in just 3 words?  Once you have your 3 words, use a thesaurus on each one and find alternative words for yourself.
  2. Describe your worst self in 3 words – be brutally honest with yourself.  The key here is to dig deep and not list what you have heard others say, but what you know to be your worst self.  Challenge each of these traits.  Where did they come from?
  3. If you were allowed to change one physical aspect of yourself – what would it be? Remember to write out why you want it changed? Reflect on what you have written.  Do you want to change it because of the way you feel in front of others? Examine this feeling.
  4. What is your goal for 2013?  Be very specific. Detail how you are going to achieve your goal.
  5. Write down 5 things that you are truly grateful for.

Put the date on the top right hand corner of the paper, then fold it into a neat little square and put it somewhere safe (not too safe that you forget about it).  Put a reminder on your phone or in your email to check your list in 3 months time.  Do the list again.  Have you changed?  Is your goal still on track?  Are there 5 new things you are grateful for?

One of the keys to unlocking self awareness is to understand that it is a continuous process that never ends.  It’s like the tiny snowball that gets bigger and bigger as it rolls along.  The more you understand yourself, the more you want to understand yourself.  Dig deep, you can only better yourself.